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I held my hands toward the heavens,
So my mighty God could see.
I had nothing to give Him,
Though He gave everything to me.
He gave His only Son,
Who died on the Cross that day.
He shed His blood for me,
And my sins were washed away.
Faith, Hope, and Love,
Love being the greatest of the three.
From Him comes my salvation.
And His grace pours out on thee,
Thank you God....for loving me!
It was August 2005 and I had turned my back on God. I was trapped in an addiction to one of the worst drugs on the streets "ICE." My addiction had cost me the loss of all I had including the relationship with my family. I had reached the point of giving up on life. Having no one to turn to, I cried out to God for help. Three days later I was arrested and brought to the Lake County Jail where I was blessed to hear God's Word shared with me by Chaplain Pete Bandstra and the volunteers. After attending many services, being taught of my position in Christ, and through these brothers and sisters I was able to stand firm on the day I got sentenced to 25 years in prison. I thank God for the loving concern of Chaplain Pete and the volunteers.
I was able to put all my confidence in my Savior Jesus Christ. I was able to hold fast to a few words that Chaplain Pete told me before I went to prison. "Ruben, it is an honor to be able to go into a mission field where we can't go." It was these God given words that have helped me go through many hard times and help others find Christ. When I reached my permanent correctional institution I was blessed to have met Chaplain Ronald Evans, a man of God that has truly been there for me in times of trouble. I was given the opportunity to work as a Chapel Clerk at the prison and to continue a discipleship training course from Evangelism Explosion International (a ministry that I was encouraged to enroll in while at LCJ). I am grateful to be a leader and trainer in discipling other men in the prison's "Genesis Project" faith-based/self-improvement dorm. My foundation in Christ has enabled me to lead others to Christ. It has helped me make wise decisions - like enrolling in education to get my GED, Law Clerk Certification, and Bible college courses toward an Associate's degree. Knowledge and skills I desire to use once I am released from prison.
I have much to be thankful for, but most of all for God blessing me with Christ-centered teaching by the volunteers at the Lake County Jail, my family in Christ here in prison - Chaplain, volunteers, and brothers including Alfonso. They have helped me grow in knowing and understanding the Word of God which has greatly strengthened my faith and given me a positive attitude. Considering my circumstances this has been a real blessing. In the past my lack of self esteem and personal insecurity contributed to the problems I caused others and myself. Not having an education or desire to help myself or others also hurt me. But the Lord answered my cry by putting godly men and women in my life and it has made a world of difference. Their sharing Christ's love has truly motivated me through my recovery. Their honest and Christ-like manner of sharing God's Word was a life-changing experience. I thank God for Sheriff Borders and Major Maas for allowing Chaplain Pete and the volunteers to come in and make a difference in our lives. I also thank God for the men and women that are providing a way (through prayers and donations) for Chaplain Pete to continue ministering in the Lake County Jail.
As Charles H. Spurgeon (a 19th century preacher) said, "If there existed only one man or woman who did not love the Savior, and if that person lived among the wilds of Siberia, and if it were necessary that all the millions of believers on the face of the earth should journey there, and every one of them plead with him to come to Jesus before he could be converted, it would be well worth all the zeal, labor and expense. If we had to preach to thousands year after year and never rescued but one soul, that one soul would be full reward for all our labor, for a soul is a countless price." That man was me and I am very thankful. Thank you for not giving up on me. I am now going on my fourth year in prison and I am very blessed to say that I have been able to share my faith with my family members and restore broken relationships. Since I was sentenced the Lord has blessed me with reducing five years of my sentence. So I now have a 20 year sentence and I am very grateful to say that if it would take the Lord the rest of my sentence to prepare me to bring one more person to Christ it would be well worth it. Though I know I can't go back and make a brand new beginning, I can start from now and make a brand new ending. "Though He slays me, yet will I trust in Him" Job 13:15. In Jesus Name!
What happened to the Children of yesterday...
Who used to run and, jump and play...
Riding horsey, on daddy's knees...
Sittin' on his shoulder, so they could see...
Going to church, and Sunday school...
What happened to learning the Golden Rule...
What happened to saying, your prayers at night...
Getting tucked in, and kissed good night...
Loving the littlest puppy, because he's the runt...
Birthday parties and Easter egg hunts...
Where is the child, who loved the clown...
What happened to turn his life around...
Where are the kisses, and good night hugs...
When did the children, become little thugs...
Cigarettes, beer, and even drugs, caught them by surprise...
Where are the innocent little kids, the apple of our eyes...
The bully on the playground, the kid who brought a gun...
The one Dad took fishing, Oh where is his loving son...
What have we done as parents, to cause our kids such sorrow...For the children of today, are the leaders of tomorrow...
I have been in the Lake County Jail for 3 months. I've worked for a local church for 2 years and also in the Men's Rescue Mission. The Lord has done a great work in my life and He is still working on this "vessel" putting the broken pieces back together again. What a great healing the Lord has done!
I started looking back to my old life like a lot of His children do from time to time. Like a lot of others I came from a broken home and at an early age I learned to depend on myself. As a child my aunt and uncle who raised me would take me to an old time gospel church. However, when I got older my life changed. The crowd that I hung around with was not the right one. But now I know that God had His hand on my life all along. Alcohol and drugs almost killed me several times. I know from my heart that I do belong to Him and I am very grateful. My goal is to be back at the mission where my family is (I miss them so much) and helping people that have been down the same road as me. I made a mistake but my faith in my Lord has brought me through. Will I ever give up again? No, not ever! Don't ever look back my brother because we know what is waiting-pain, shame, and the same old things. May the Lord Jesus Christ lift your spirit daily.
Thanks to you who sent in testimonies, poems, songs, stories, and drawings. We hope more of you will write for the next issue of Full Pardon. Send them to Chaplain Pete along with a request form. Remember to try to keep it to 200-250 words. To share Full Pardon with those on the outside they can go to www.trinityfree.com/fullpardon on the Internet. Trust God, He is on your side - if you will let Him be. He loves you!
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